


Nobody Compares

by sophies_earbuds



Category: Keeper of the Lost Cities Series - Shannon Messenger
Genre: F/M, Pining, Songfic, anyway just enjoy, but im not one for sad fics, i apologise but i thought it fit, i could have made it a lot sadder, so it takes place in a non legacy universe, sophie doesn't know anything, there is one single curse word, this was mostly self indulgent, this was written mostly before legacy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-02-17 22:13:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21517279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophies_earbuds/pseuds/sophies_earbuds
Summary: Keefe is supposed to be moving on now that Sophie is with FitzBut nobody compares to Sophie.I am dedicating this work to the ever lovely @Silveny-Dreams and @TheUnmappedStar for their inspiration and help on this fic, and for being my motivation to actually finish it. This is my longest work to date guys! I'm proud of myself for actually having a plan and sticking to it (even if it took four months). Honestly, I don't know how Shannon Messenger puts out a whole book every year like clockwork, even 14k words was hard enough for me!
Relationships: Sophie Foster/Fitz Vacker, Sophie Foster/Keefe Sencen
Comments: 11
Kudos: 81





	Nobody Compares

**_“No one ever looks so good in a dress, and it hurts ‘cause I know you won’t be mine tonight.”_ **

Keefe couldn’t stop staring. 

He knew he should’ve, but he just couldn’t peel his eyes away. All he could do was stand in the corner of the Foxfire atrium and stare at the one girl he couldn’t have as she danced with his own best friend. 

The Foxfire celebratory ball was supposed to be a great night. They were supposed to all go as a group, and Magnate Leto was going to embarrass them all with a speech about how they saved the world and all of that boring stuff. Seeing Sophie try to convince Mr. Forkle not to do it was quite the show. But he wouldn’t budge, saying the council had set it all up and was going to be there. 

And yet, once Keefe had arrived at the school feeling confident and being well dressed, he was immediately shot down by the sight of Sophie laughing with Fitz, blushing madly and looking beautiful. 

He couldn’t help but stare and drink her in. She had her hair tousled in curls, hanging over her shoulders and framing her face perfectly, bouncing as she moved her head. She’d evidently done her makeup for the event, seeing as her cheeks and eyelids reflected the light that shone down from the ceiling. Her usual necessary jewelry had been replaced with something more decorative; a single teal brooch in the shape of a heart hung on her neck, and her charm bracelet. Her dress, the colour of a rose and cut above the knee, complemented her perfectly. 

He knew that if he was close enough he’d be able to see the golden flecks that stood out in her eyes whenever she wore red, but even from across the room he could see how the colour made her stand out in the huge crowd. She looked even more elegant than she usually did. 

She was absolutely amazing. The only thing that felt wrong was who she was with. 

He knew going into the night that Sophie was going to be with Fitz. But that one corner of his mind kept nagging at him, and that corner’s name was Empathy. He couldn’t ignore the emotions he felt coming off of her, showing one thing as she said another. He’d never be able to forget what he felt that first time she’d enhanced him, giving him that final piece of the puzzle. Seeing her with Fitz after seeing those subconscious emotions felt like a slap in the face. 

“Hey, Keefe!” he heard, and reluctantly looked away from Sophie to see Biana walk swiftly across the room, having gone above and beyond with her outfit - a dress that seemed to shift from blue to purple as she walked, which was even more disorienting paired with her blinking - and was waving at him to get his attention.

She looked around the atrium, waving to people she knew. “Did you get to see Sophie yet tonight? She mentioned that she wanted to talk to you about something.” 

Keefe’s heart skipped a beat, and the loud chattering around him seemed to dim as he reminded himself to breathe. “Did she say what it was about?”

“No, she was kind of secretive about it, she just wanted me to let you know to find her when I saw you,” Biana told him, offering a sweet smile that resembled that of her mother. 

Keefe glanced back over at Sophie, starting to build up the nerve to go over and ask her what she wanted to talk to him about, his eyes lingering as she smiled brightly, luminating everything around her. 

“Thanks,” he mumbled to Biana, not looking away as he began to walk toward Sophie and Fitz, feeling no hesitation to interrupt whatever it was they were doing. And he couldn’t help but get his hopes up. He knew it was probably something completely underwhelming, but anything to do with Sophie made his brain turn to mush, and he couldn’t think properly. He hoped he was at least good at pretending he knew what he was doing whenever he was around her. 

From across the room, Sophie looked over at him, smiled, and held a hand up to wave him over. That beautiful smile seemed to send an arrow straight through his heart, because he had to catch his breath and shake himself into his confidence, the familiar feeling of a smirk finding his lips as he strode over, sticking his hands into his pockets. 

“Wow, Foster, look at you all sparkled up,” he led with, looking her up and down. Her shoes were silver flats, and the choice amused Keefe. He applauded her way to evade the societal pressure, even if she was just refusing to wear heeled shoes.

“Yeah, Biana helped me get ready, which means sparkles everywhere and having to wear makeup,” she said, shifting her eyes to the side and tucking her hair behind her ear. Though the strand of hair just came back out in front of her face. Keefe had to resist the urge to reach out and tuck it back behind her ear for her. 

He chanced a look at Fitz, whose face looked stone-like as he glared back, his arms crossed over his chest. Keefe looked down at his shoes, remembering that Sophie wasn’t free to flirt with anymore.

He had to back off. 

“You probably enjoy being all made up, looking nice for the Fitzter over here,” he commented, taking his hand out of his pocket to point his thumb at Fitz, but the blush on Sophie’s face the only reply he received. Maybe that was the wrong thing to say. He didn’t really know what he was supposed to do now that Sophie and Fitz were… whatever they were. 

“Oh, I need to talk to you about something, can you walk with me for a minute?” Sophie asked, regaining her composure as she set down the cup she was holding and grabbed onto Keefe’s wrist. 

“Doesn’t seem like I have much of a choice, Miss Bossy Pants,” he joked, walking along behind her. He didn’t dare to look back at Fitz’s reaction. Though he did feel the slightest bit accomplished, seeing as Sophie ditched Fitz mid conversation to talk to him. He should have probably felt guilty about feeling great, but he just couldn’t stop his mind from going down the hopeful routes. 

Sophie led him out of the atrium, walking fairly quickly. He watched as her hair bounced and her dress moved with every step she took. He noticed that she was feeling anxious, and seemed pretty rushed, so she was probably pretty nervous about what she was about to talk to him about. 

They didn’t stop walking until they’d reached the Level Four wing, right in front of Sophie’s locker. She must not have cleaned it out yet, since they had just taken finals and were supposed to be graduating to the next levels. 

“You nervous about tonight?” she asked, looking up at him but not quite meeting his eyes. 

Confused, Keefe answered, “yeah, a little. Though it’s not like I hate the spotlight.” 

Sophie chuckled, nodding her head. “How could I forget that you want all of this attention,” she told him, crossing her arms over her stomach, looking down at her shoes. Suddenly, Keefe realised that her anxiousness and hurriedness was coming from the dread she had about standing up in front of all of those people. 

He reached out to touch her arm, offering a small smile as she looked up at him. Finally, he had the opportunity to look into her eyes and notice the golden flecks he loved so much, that filled up his dreams every night. She was wearing that brown eyeliner that always complemented her eyes so well. 

After a moment, Sophie looked back down again, seeming flustered from the long eye contact. Keefe could feel the change in her emotions, and she was more guilty than nervous. 

“You shouldn’t worry about tonight, all you have to do is stand up there and look pretty. You’ll have no trouble with that,” he said softly, though as soon as it came out of his mouth he knew he shouldn’t have. She was with Fitz now. He couldn’t be doing that. 

“What if they ask me to say something?”

“Then I’ll jump in and divert the attention to my amazing improvisational skills,” he said, chuckling. Sophie smiled along with him, taking a noticeably deep breath. 

“You know Magnate Leto will punish you for that,” she reminded him. 

“And we both know that a little punishment has never stopped me.” 

Sophie nodded, then turned to her locker to lick the DNA strip. Keefe let go of her arm. “So, I have something for you,” she said, opening her locker while trying to make as little sound as possible. And while he may have looked normal on the outside, his heart was picking up speed as Sophie pulled out a little velvet drawstring pouch. It was the same one Keefe gave to her with his mother’s necklace in it. 

“You’re not returning my gift, are you?” he teased, though he was incredibly nervous that that was  _ exactly  _ what she was doing. 

“No, I have it at home. This is something different,” she said, opening the bag slowly, like she was debating whether or not she wanted to show the bag’s contents. 

When she did finally reveal what was in the bag, he was surprised to see a long chain with a home crystal tied at the end. 

“Grady and Edaline wanted me to give you this. It’s a crystal that leads to Havenfield,” she told him, holding it out for Keefe to see. He gingerly reached out to take the necklace from her hand, and looked at it with tears starting to burn his eyes, but he was determined not to cry. Especially not before standing in front of all of those people.

“They wanted you to know that no matter what, there’s always a home for you at Havenfield,” she said, the end of her sentenced coming out in a whisper. He looked her in the eyes, seeing that she was so sincere in her words that she believed them as well. This wasn’t coming just from her parents. 

“I’ll thank them the next time I’m over, which I guess will be sooner rather than later.” He put the chain around his neck and tucked it into his shirt. “And thank  _ you _ . For sticking around with me through all of the bad stuff.”

“Right back at you.”

For a moment, they stood in comfortable silence, just being in each other’s company. But the atmosphere was shattered when Sophie cleared her throat, and stuffed the velvet pouch back in her locker, closing it with the clang of metal. 

“I should probably get back to Fitz,” she whispered, seeming disoriented, like she didn’t necessarily plan for those to be the words that came out of her mouth. She scratched at her eyebrow and tried to tame her wild hair again, still having no luck as it moved itself back in front of her face. “You coming?” 

Keefe winked at her, and waved her away. “Nah, I’ll meet you in there, I have to go check on something.” 

Sophie tilted her head. “You better not be planning another prank. You don’t even have classes in this building anymore,” she warned him, an amused smile finding her face. Keefe couldn’t help but stare as his knees started to feel like Jell-o. 

“That’s for me to know, and you to find out,” he teased, the smirk finding his face again. Sophie shook her head in disbelief, then turned on her heels to walk away, hair bouncing and dress moving again. 

He’d never seen anyone look as beautiful in a dress as she did. 

**_“No one ever makes me feel like you do when you smile, baby tell me how to make it right.”_ **

“Seriously, did they have to put the Sanctuary right in the middle of the Himalayas?” Sophie said through chattering teeth, pulling her cloak closed and up to her chin. At least this time she’d brought a heavier one, though Keefe wouldn’t mind lending his to her again. He’d never forget what it felt like to see her wearing something of his, paired up with the snowflakes that had fallen onto her eyelashes and in her hair, and the red of her cheeks in the cold. 

“Remember the body regulation training we did. Snap your fingers,” he told her, trying to focus on the small bits of warmth between his cloak and his skin, and snapped his fingers, instantly feeling much warmer. He watched as Sophie copied him, and the smile that adorned her face told him that it’d worked. 

She let go of her cloak and let it drape down behind her, revealing the white tunic and black leggings she was wearing. Evidently, she’d prepared for the task they were taking on that day. 

After Luna and Wynn were born, Sophie and Keefe had been asked by the Council and personally requested by Jurek - the equestrian caretaker - to look after them, since they were the best with the alicorns as a whole species. And it was safe to assume that caring for baby alicorns would probably be messy, and include an excessive amount of sparkly poop. 

“You don’t think there’s something wrong with them, do you?” Sophie asked, not quite looking him in the eye. Her emotions proved her to be even more nervous than she let on, but there was something else lingering in there - fear.

He took a chance and grabbed her hand, slowly lacing their fingers together, giving Sophie a chance to pull away. But she only held on tighter, the contact making his whole body even warmer, and not just because of the temperature regulation. “They would have told us if something was wrong. It’s probably just a routine checkup,” he said, staring at his shoes in the fluffy snow. Then he looked up, seeing the hesitation in Sophie’s brown eyes. “You don’t have anything to worry about,” he told her with a small, reassuring smile. 

She took a deep breath, seeming to ground herself as the doors to the Sanctuary started to open, and even Keefe had to prepare himself for the possibility of something having gone wrong with the twins. After all, when they’d been called to the Sanctuary to deal with the issue between Silveny and Greyfell, they weren’t given any warning. 

As they walked through the doors, the atmosphere changed quickly from the bite of cold to the nice breeze of the seaside, even though there was no water around. Keefe couldn’t help but feel more at ease when they were in the Sanctuary, especially with Sophie’s hand in his. It felt like… before all of the stuff happened. Before Sophie and Fitz, before finding out his mom was in the Neverseen, before the fire that changed everything. It felt right.

Over one of the hills, Keefe could see a deer looking around, alert to them just walking in. All around them small animals scurried around; rabbits, chipmunks, squirrels, even a few rats and mice were chasing each other. There didn’t seem to be a place in all of the Lost Cities where everyone was so happy. 

“Do you think Jurek is going to make us roll down the hill again?” Sophie asked, something like dread in her voice. Keefe had to laugh, and was pleased when he looked over and found her pouting. She was cute all the time, but the pouting just made her downright adorable. 

“Oh I hope so, though let’s also hope you’ve been working on those landings,” Keefe teased, remembering what happened the last time they’d rolled down that hill. 

Not that he could even bring it up. 

Having to jump the hurdles in his friendship with Sophie was proving to be quite difficult, and even emotionally draining. If he talked about her and Fitz, she got all fidgety and uncomfortable, so he avoided that. And when he wanted to complement her like he used to, she’d shoot him down immediately and try to change the subject, so he stopped doing that too. He couldn’t tease her without feeling like he was betraying Fitz, and all he wanted was to be a good friend. 

All he had to do was stop liking her, and everything would be fine. He could be her friend, be there for her through the highs and the lows, and not feel like he wanted to kiss her every time they were in the same room together. 

But somehow he didn’t see that happening. 

So, his only other option was to back off, and be there when she needed him. Let his feelings stay dormant, and let her take the lead. If he was right with his theory of subconscious emotions, then things would work out in his favour. And even if they didn’t, just having Sophie in his life was more than enough. It was a privilege. 

“I think I can probably just walk down the hill,” Sophie said through a growing smile. The air seemed to brighten her mood as well, because her grin was absolutely radiant when Keefe looked over at her with a smirk. She practically glowed, and it made Keefe’s heart skip a beat. He had to catch his breath as he began to hear his pulse behind his ears. 

“We both know that won’t go well,” he teased as they strolled along through the pasture. It felt cheesy, like they should have been skipping along with a rainbow in the background. 

Sophie’s mood quickly changed from worried to flustered, then to guilty, and it made Keefe wonder just how little he really had to do to affect her. 

How much Sophie really felt about him without admitting it. 

He shook his head quickly, and across the pasture saw Jurek standing, waiting for them. He waved them over, and Keefe could feel just how nervous Sophie became once again.

Focusing on his shoes, Keefe concentrated on Sophie’s hand in his, how even with her gloves on he could feel the pulse of her enhancing, and honed in on the radiating waves that opened up the tunnel straight to her emotional center. As he took a deep breath, he squeezed her hand, sending those charged waves of emotion he knew she appreciated. 

It was gratifying to feel her ease up next to him, hear her take a deep breath. And when he looked over, she was smiling once again, making his brain feel fuzzy and his legs feel like they would give out any moment. 

“Jurek doesn’t look worried, neither should you,” he told her, his voice just above a whisper. 

“I think I’m allowed to worry about these babies, considering they were developed in troll goo,” Sophie muttered to him, and he had to laugh. 

“Did you just say troll goo?” 

Sophie was quiet for a moment. “Well, what else should we call it?”

He couldn’t argue with that. 

They approached Jurek in silence, still hand in hand, which Keefe was immensely relieved about. He was worried that she’d be hesitant about holding his hand after being with Fitz, but it seemed that they were still okay in that department. Holding Sophie’s hand grounded him, kept him on his feet. 

“Thanks for coming on such short notice,” Jurek said once they’d come within hearing distance. “We wanted to do a checkup on the babies, but they seem to take after Silveny.” 

“They won’t let you touch them?” Sophie asked, sounding worried. Keefe squeezed her hand, reminding her to stay calm. 

Jurek started walking, and Keefe followed, pulling Sophie along with him. “It’s no big deal, they seem to be fine around me any other time, they just run away every time I bring out the medical bag.” 

Keefe smirked. “Then they really take after you, Foster,” he teased, leaning into her side and feeling relieved when she let go of some of the worry she was feeling before. 

Jurek studied them for a moment before turning back around, telling them that the alicorns were just around the bend. 

Sophie flinched next to him, her hand coming up to massage her temple. “Sorry. I guess Silveny knows we’re here,” she said sheepishly. Keefe couldn’t help but grin, knowing he was about to see the alicorn family. He always got a little too excited about seeing the alicorns, and the birth of the twins only amplified that excitement. He’d never forget the moment he and Sophie had named them. 

As they turned the corner, the first glimpse they got of the alicorns was of the twins prancing around, jumping high and trying to nose dive as Silveny and Greyfell stood off, watching them. 

“Their wings aren’t developed enough to carry them, so they’ve been practising their dives. It’s very interesting to watch them grow from birth, we’ve never had an opportunity like this,” Jurek explained just as Silveny began to walk over to them. 

“Well, we’re happy to help in any way we can,” Sophie said, looking over at Keefe for confirmation. He nodded before Jurek turned to retrieve his medical equipment, and reached up to stroke Silveny’s velvety nose, noting how excited she felt at seeing them. While her emotions were definitely overbearing, he was sure that Sophie had an even bigger headache coming on from her transmissions. 

“How are you, Mama Glitterbutt? Taking care of your babies?” he asked, even though he already knew the answer. 

Silveny whinnied in response, headbutting his hand affectionately as Sophie brushed through her silvery mane with her fingers, looking beautiful as she seemed caught up in her thoughts. 

Keefe had to stop staring. He knew he should have stopped, but she was so captivating, the way she scrunched her nose from time to time, or tilted her head at Silveny, likely reacting to some transmission. She’d smile, or frown, or raise her eyebrows, and Keefe couldn’t help but want to see it all. It was interesting to see her reactions without seeing the cause, especially when he could feel the emotions that went along with those reactions. 

But one image stayed at the forefront of his mind. Sophie grinning, just about to laugh, as she looked so caringly into Silveny’s eyes that even a non-empath would be able to feel how happy she was just from looking at her. 

And it was the best feeling, to know that Sophie was so blissfully happy. Unaware of anything around her. 

When she stopped laughing, she turned to Keefe with the same heartwarming smile. “She says that the babies are doing great, and Greyfell is a very good dad.” 

“Well of course the babies are doing great, they have the best parents in the world.” Their eyes met for a split second, and Keefe had to remind himself to blink as he looked away, too nervous to let Sophie see the emotion in eyes, preferring to let her think that he was okay, that he wasn’t completely in love with her. If she knew that, everything would fall apart. 

If Sophie noticed anything, she didn’t show it, and instead walked over to where Greyfell was watching the twins, grazing slowly. “I knew they would be. See Silveny? You had nothing to worry about.” 

Silveny whinnied her response once again, and Keefe felt the annoyance coming off of her. 

“Yeah, I don’t think she likes it when you’re right,” he told Sophie, laughing through his words. He could feel that his smile was more than a smirk, he knew it had to be more fond than anything, but she wasn’t looking. 

She laughed as she reached out, waiting for Greyfell to close the distance and tell her it was okay to pet him. “Then I guess she doesn’t like me all the time,” she said, whipping her head around to look at Keefe. 

And god, was he in trouble. 

Her loose hair flew behind her head with the motion, but that was nothing compared to the bright smile on her face, showing off her perfect teeth and hitting him with the full force of her emotions, so strong it almost made him giggle. Even her brown eyes were smiling, and joy was just written all over her face. The way she looked at him made his stomach do a series of backflips, his brain starting to short circuit as his heart started beating a mile a minute, and he knew he was a goner. 

That girl in front of him was the light of his life. 

And he couldn’t be with her. 

Keefe gulped, remembering to breathe as he replied nonchalantly with “yeah, I guess so.” It wasn’t exactly the most witty of responses, but he had to get at least a few words out before he stared any longer. 

That time, Sophie definitely noticed his staring, if the deep crimson on her cheekbones was anything to go by. She looked back at Greyfell quickly, just as he knocked his nose into her hand, and looked down at her shoes, petting Greyfell’s head delicately. 

After that, they were pretty quiet until the checkup began five minutes later, when Jurek returned with his medical bag and a basket full of swizzlespice. 

“Alright, time to see how these babies are actually doing,” he started, opening up the bag and pulling out a simple stethoscope as Sophie and Keefe each took a few stalks of the swizzlespice. “How about you each take care of a twin. Go preoccupy them while I take their vitals.” 

Keefe gravitated toward Luna as Sophie cautiously approached Wynn, trying not to scare the babies as they carried on with their nose dives, seemingly unaware of anything around them. 

Sophie was obviously transmitting to Wynn, seeing as her eyes were closed and the small alicorn had just stopped moving to stare straight at her. Keefe had to resort to good old fashioned bribing. 

He stalked closer, holding his arm out with a handful of the purple treat to earn Luna’s trust. “Come on, you know you want some. All of the other kids are doing it,” he said as Luna started eating out of his hand. 

“Don’t peer pressure the baby, Keefe,” Sophie scolded, making him laugh. 

“I’m not too good with kids, Foster, bribery is all I know,” he explained, marvelling at the way Luna started pushing his hand for him to pet her. Or for more treats. 

“What are you talking about? Aren’t you the guy who saves kids?” Sophie teased from where she was sitting on the grass with a much calmer Wynn, stroking his mane as Jurek started on his checkup. 

“I believe my words were the  _ cute _ guy who saves kids,” he corrected, sitting down with Luna as she kept headbutting him until he relented and pet her velvety nose. She looked as though she were completely dipped in moonlight, her sparkly, silvery sheen reflecting the manufactured light of the Sanctuary.

Sophie shook her head, looking amused. “I will believe you when I see it with my own eyes,” she said, giving Wynn more swizzlespice.

Keefe tried his hardest to ignore her statement, to tell his brain to back off with it’s fruitless hope that she had some sort of underlying meaning to what she was saying. He tried to tuck those feelings into the corner of his mind full of things he’d rather forget, and to pretend not to be in love with the girl in front of him. 

Sophie laughed, tilting her head and looking puzzled at him. “You’ve been acting weird today, are you okay?” she asked, making Keefe’s cheeks warm as the blood rushed to his face at her noticing. 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he choked out, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. He could tell that Sophie didn’t believe him when he met her eyes, but if she wanted to ask again, she didn’t show it. She only looked down at Wynn, focusing on Jurek finishing up the first checkup. 

There wasn’t any talking once Jurek started on Luna. And to say it was awkward was the understatement of the century. 

Even as they said goodbye to Jurek and the alicorn family, they couldn’t meet each other’s eyes. Or maybe Sophie could, but Keefe wouldn’t look away from his shoes as they walked out of the Sanctuary and into the snowy cold of the Himalayas. 

Though the freezing cold was the least of his problems when Sophie took his hand and said, “I may not be an Empath, but I can tell when something’s wrong.” 

All Keefe could do was sigh. 

“Seriously, Keefe. I don’t like seeing you like this, so either tell me what’s wrong or I might have to read your mind,” she said, and while her tone was teasing, Keefe still backed away, not wanting to risk that happening. 

“Don’t. You won’t like it up here, it’s full of crazy thoughts,” he made up, letting go of her hand, watching as she slipped away. 

Like he was watching himself let go of her. 

“Okay, yours and everyone else’s. The only difference is that I’ve actually been in your mind before,” she walked toward him again, and he only stepped back on one foot, gaining balance as he unwillingly became flustered again. 

He blamed the alicorn babies for making him so soft. 

“Fine, I won’t make you talk. I just… can’t stand the thought that… maybe I’ve done something wrong.” She seemed to make herself smaller, even her voice coming to just barely a whisper. Keefe stepped closer once again, tapping the tips of their boots together as he grabbed her hand the same way she’d taken his before. 

It was like deja vu with the snow coming down, puffs of their hot breath coming out in clouds between them, paired with the redness of Sophie’s cheeks. He could see the image clear as day, the snowflakes that had settled on her eyelashes and in her hair, and the way she was examining his face, looking at just about everything but his eyes. 

He could never forget that day, no matter how hard he tried. 

He could never forget the way Sophie had been so close, had invited him over to her house,  _ had said she liked him _ . How she had excitedly shown him that she was wearing the necklace he’d given her. 

How he’d messed it all up. 

“Sophie, you could never do something wrong in my eyes,” he whispered, all of the emotions from that day coming back to him in a huge burst, making his chest tight, squeezing Sophie’s hand as he braced himself. 

He didn’t even care that he’d broken his rule. 

“I’m worried I messed this all up.”

Those words - words he had just been thinking of - pulled him out of his trance once he realised it wasn’t him who’d said them, and he looked into Sophie’s eyes, feeling the fear, the anxiety. 

_ The guilt.  _

“Sophie-”

He tried to stay on track, he really did. But he couldn’t stop Sophie from standing on her toes, from reaching her hand up to hold onto his jaw, from leaning in and planting a nervous but firm kiss to his lips. 

And if he’d thought her emotions were intense before, that was nothing compared to what he felt in that moment. 

The wide range of giddy to horrified, from satisfied to half empty. But the most prominent was the resolve. 

He didn’t have a chance to react, to even kiss back, before she was pulling away, wiping at her nose and pulling out her home crystal. 

“Don’t tell.”

And with that, she was gone. 

**_“All of my friends say it’s not really worth it, but even if that’s true.”_ **

Keefe had to tell someone. 

He was usually good at keeping secrets, but he couldn’t stay quiet about something like this. 

_ Sophie Foster kissed him.  _

Under any other circumstance, he might want to sing it from the rooftops. But the fact that she was still with Fitz made the whole situation that much harder to deal with. 

So, that left only two people to talk to - Dex, and Tam. 

Sure, it would be easier to talk to Dex, since he was also a member of the I Kissed Sophie Foster Club, but he was also her best friend. Something like that should be Sophie’s decision to tell him, and he wouldn’t take that away from her. Which meant…

“Wait, she did  _ what _ ?” 

Keefe sighed for what had to have been the millionth time in the past five hours. 

“She said, ‘I’m worried I messed this all up,’ and then she kissed me, and told me not to tell,” Keefe repeated, resting his forehead in his palms and rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. 

“So you thought the best idea was to come to me? And do the one thing she told you not to do?” Tam annoyingly pointed out. But his face wasn’t smug, it was worried. For once, he actually looked concerned for Keefe. 

“Wouldn’t you?” 

Tam didn’t answer, but his face gave away what he was thinking. He looked down at his shoes, then back up at Keefe, pushing his bangs to the side to properly examine him. 

After Tam had come home, he and Keefe had formed a sort of bond, having both lived with the Neverseen. Sure, Keefe still thought his hair was stupid, but at least they had an understanding of each other, and could be in the same room without bickering. 

Well, most of the time. 

“Dude, you look like a mess,” Tam commented. 

Keefe closed his eyes, willing himself not to yell. “Yeah,  _ I know _ ,” he said, rolling his eyes. “And this was a bad idea,” he continued, starting to get up to leave, to go talk to anyone but Bangs Boy. 

But Tam grabbed his wrist, and Keefe felt the concern he’d seen earlier, that strive to help. “You’re right, you shouldn’t have to figure this out on your own,” he said, urging him to sit back down. 

Tam’s room in Tiergan’s house was  _ huge.  _ There wasn’t much personalisation, a lot like Sophie’s room, but he had huge stacks of books everywhere, and so many places to sit. It was like he did nothing but read all day. 

“Sophie and Fitz are  _ cognates _ . How long is she going to be able to keep this secret from him?” he asked, voicing the very concern Keefe had mulled over earlier. 

“Well, she went like, two years without telling him she had a crush on him, so I wouldn’t underestimate her when it comes to secrets. You’re forgetting that she kept her Telepathy a secret for seven years,” Keefe said, feeling like some sort of creepy stalker. 

Tam must have thought so too, because he offered the smallest smile and raised an eyebrow, saying, “looks like someone’s done their Sophie homework.”

For a moment, Keefe smiled back, and it almost felt like they were just two friends hanging out. 

“Photographic memory,” he explained, hoping his cheeks weren’t as red as they felt. But he was all out of luck, because Tam smiled even wider, a crooked type of smile that came from the years of scowling, frowning, and having nothing to smile about. 

“Yeah, alright.” 

The silence that followed was pretty awkward, but not uncomfortable, which Keefe saw as progress, diffusing the earlier tension in the room. He almost didn’t want to punch him in the bangs anymore. 

“You should wait for her to make the next move,” Tam said out of the blue, breaking their silence. “It may not be worth it to pursue her while she’s still with Fitz, even if she did kiss you.”

Keefe tilted his head, angry that he was right. Not wanting to take his advice, but knowing he had to. Knowing this was a decision Sophie had to make herself. 

It killed him to not be able to do anything. 

“I can’t just forget about it. I can’t pretend it didn’t happen,” he said, mostly to himself. But Tam nodded at him. 

“I know. But you don’t want to be the bad guy. Trust me. Any guy in Fitz’s position would make the guy in your position the bad guy.”

Keefe stood up then, practically ripping his hands through his hair, not even worried that he’d ruined any sort of style he may have had. He’d pretty much given up on appearance after Sophie had left the Sanctuary, practically ripping his hair out in frustration wondering  _ what the hell he was supposed to do.  _

“I can’t let Sophie be the bad guy though,” he practically shouted. Apparently it was too loud, because Linh and Wylie ended up poking their heads in a few seconds later, wondering what was wrong. Probably wanting to make sure he and Tam hadn’t started killing each other. 

Keefe walked over to the single window in Tam’s room, overlooking a pasture of lush green grass with nothing but a few trees strewn about, like it was never intended to be used. 

“Linh, it’s fine, I don’t think he wants this to be a public thing-” Tam started before either of them could even get a word out, but Keefe turned back around.

He looked to Wylie first, though he wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was because he was the oldest, the one with the experience that might be able to help him. 

“I assume you were listening through the door,” Keefe mumbled, feeling like an act, like someone made for people to laugh at. He felt like he had nothing more to hide. 

Wylie had the decency to look sheepish. Linh only grinned. “Well, you just looked so worried when you came over, we only wanted to make sure you were okay,” she told him, sounding almost sorry. 

Keefe nodded, biting his lip and looking down at his shoes. “So, what do you guys think I should do?” he asked, looking back up, admitting defeat, admitting that he no longer had any sort of dignity to lose. 

Wylie stepped closer, a soft look on his face. “I’d wait to see what she does next. If she really cares about you, she won’t leave you with just that. And if she’s scared she made a mistake, then she needs to sort that out with her boyfriend.” 

Keefe nodded again, wondering why he’d never asked Wylie for any advice before. He seemed to be one of the only logical people he knew. “I know this problem must sound ridiculous. ‘Hey, poor me, the girl of my dreams just kissed me, boo hoo.’”

“It doesn’t sound like that. It sounds like the girl of your dreams kissed you while she’s in a relationship with someone else, and put you in the awkward position,” Wylie corrected. 

“I know you have history with her-”

“That has nothing to do with this. We’ve settled our differences. I’m saying this as an impartial third party. She put you both in this position, and she has to be the one to get you both out.”

Keefe had half the sense to take his advice. To do nothing and wait. And he knew he should. 

But that kiss would be the only thing he’d think about until the whole thing was resolved. 

“What do you think, Linh?” he asked.

She bit her lip in thought, twisting her fingers so hard it looked like it hurt. “Well, I guess I just want all three of you to come out of this happy. Have we stopped to think that maybe the feeling is mutual between Sophie and Fitz?”

Keefe shook his head. “I know Fitz. He’s wanted this for awhile.” 

“Yeah, but so did Sophie. If she’s starting to feel like she made the wrong choice, it’s more than possible that Fitz is feeling the same thing,” Wylie told him, and Keefe had half a mind to know not to ask how he knew that stuff. 

“And you’ve liked Sophie for as long as she’s liked Fitz,” Tam reminded him. 

That time Keefe raised an eyebrow, fully willing to question Tam. “How do you even know all of this?” 

Tam shrugged like it was no big deal. “Biana talks.”

“And it’s pretty obvious, the way you look at her gives you away,” Linh added, smiling teasingly. 

Keefe was grateful to have the dense air disperse a little bit, to have this group of people he barely knew take time out of their day to help him and make jokes with him like they’ve known each other their entire lives. 

“You do not want to pull that card on an Empath,” he joked, a hint of his smirk finally settling on his lips, making him feel a little more normal. 

***

Keefe plopped down on his bed, hands on his forehead from the headache he could feel coming on. It was stressful to worry about something out of his control. Sure, the talk with Tam, Linh, and Wylie helped ease his mind a little, but even if he was going to wait, he’d still have to deal with the problem at some point. 

Probably sometime soon, if they were right about the cognate thing. 

They had to share  _ all _ of their secrets. 

It was only a matter of time before Fitz pulled the secret out of her, and if Keefe knew Sophie, he knew she wasn’t going to hurt either of them by keeping this to herself. 

And if he was wrong, then that would be the end of it. He’d finally let go. Even if it would take a lifetime. 

He’d do anything to keep Sophie in his life in one way or another. 

“You don’t look so well,” a voice said from the doorway of his room. 

Keefe opened one eye to see who the speaker was, even though he could tell from the voice that it was his father. 

“Yeah, I don’t feel so well,” he said dismissively, propping himself up all the way on his bed to lie down, feeling too much relief from his head hitting the pillows. 

His dad must have been in a good mood that day though, because he said, “do you need anything?” with as much strain in his voice as necessary to convince Keefe that he  _ definitely  _ didn’t care at all. 

“I need people to be less complicated,” Keefe muttered, covering his eyes with his arm, his headache becoming even worse at the sound of his father’s voice. Funny how things happened that way. 

“Yes, well, the only person you can control is yourself,” his father said, sounding like he actually believed his words, like he hadn’t been trying to control Keefe his whole life. As if a 99% on a test meant he hadn’t failed, or coming in second in his class only to his best friend didn’t make him a complete disgrace. 

Keefe sighed. “Trust me, I’m well aware of that,” he said. 

With that, it seemed that his father had gotten the memo, and had the decency to back out of the room quietly, leaving the feeling of uneasiness and the need to butt in wafting through the air in his wake. 

All Keefe wanted was to be able to use his Havenfield crystal and get away from his dad. To be able to hang out with Sophie like he always had, to laugh with her and not feel like crap. To be around loving parents, even if they weren’t his own. 

He should have been happy though. After all, the girl he’d liked for years had kissed him. He’d finally gotten that moment he always wanted. Hell, he had his first kiss.

He just wished it could have been in better circumstances. That he didn’t have to wait to hear a decision that might not even get made, at the expense of someone he’d considered his best friend once. 

He wished that nobody had to be hurt. 

**_“No one in the world could stop me from not moving on baby, even if I wanted to.”_ **

As it turned out, not being able to hang out with the people he usually hung out with was Keefe’s main source of boredom and anxiety, all wrapped into one giant nerve wracking ball of  _ blah.  _

He couldn’t hang out with Sophie or Fitz because of the craziness that still hadn’t been resolved, even after a week of waiting. He’d mostly been hiding out on the beach of The Shores of Solace since school wasn’t in session, and his father rarely came home from work, probably to avoid him and his funk, which he was sure was strong enough to put any Empath in a bad mood just from proximity. 

Sure, a week wasn’t that long to wait for an emotionally distressing decision in the grand scheme of things, but it was practically killing him, wondering why there was no news, or if there was going to be any news at all. 

Maybe he was expecting too much. She may not have been serious, or not totally aware of what she was doing or-

His heart stopped. 

His imparter was going off, scaring him out of his thoughts, out of his staring into space, out of him holding his breath. He figured it must have been his dad, or maybe Dex wanting to work on a project together, since he was probably equally as bored, always working at the store during summers and almost never having free time. 

What he was not prepared to see was “Sophie Foster” flashing across his screen in bright blue glowing letters. 

He almost didn’t want to answer. 

But of course he was going to, because if Sophie felt the need to hail him during whatever awkward mess they were going through, then something important must have been happening. 

As soon as he answered the hail, Sophie’s face popped up on his screen, and he had to suck in a breath at seeing her for the first time since she kissed him. 

“Keefe?” she asked, and she sounded worried. Or maybe she was nervous. He couldn’t tell just by the look on her face, because she looked distracted, and way too in her head. She was looking at something, or someone, offscreen.

“I’m here,” he told her, worried about what this could have been about. She hadn’t contacted him at all over the week. Not telepathically, not over imparter. Not so much as a smoke signal. 

She looked back at the screen, and he could see only the hints of a smile on her lips when she finally saw his face. Maybe she was feeling the same way he was. 

It made the whole situation that much easier to deal with. 

“Could you come to Havenfield? Sometime in the next hour?”

He  _ definitely  _ didn’t expect that. 

For a moment, he considered what she could possibly need him for. If Fitz was on the other side of her imparter, laughing with her about how she was about to let Keefe down. 

Of course, they’d never do that. But anxiety was a tricky thing to squander. 

He ran a hand across his face, staring down at his shoes, too scared to look Sophie in the eyes. “I’ll be there. Is everything okay? Should I be preparing for near death?” he asked, mostly as a joke. But it probably didn’t come across that way. 

She huffed what he could only guess was a sigh, and said, “nothing like that. I just need to talk.”

That was almost more terrifying than near death. And he had the standard by which to measure it, if his picture hanging in the Healing Center was anything to go by. 

He nodded, and suddenly the screen turned black, leaving him in silence that was too tight to breathe in. 

It was then that he realised he hadn’t taken a shower in about three days, since he hadn’t left his house in a week. 

Maybe  _ that _ was why his father hadn’t come home. 

He wasn’t even sure if he’d heard his own voice since the day Sophie kissed him before he answered her hail. 

Things were almost too quiet since the bodyguards were sent back home, officially off assignment and no longer having charges. The Shores of Solace were almost erie without Ro’s voice constantly hitting the walls, and the last few weeks of school were pretty boring without hearing the goblins argue with each other about protocol, or hearing Sandor and Grizel try to settle their dispute about which of them was a better leader. 

He may regret even thinking it, but he missed Ro. 

She would have a field day if she heard that Sophie kissed him. 

She also probably would have made him shower three days ago. 

He dragged himself off of the bench swing he liked to call home and forced himself to take a shower. An hour was too short of a notice to have to get ready, considering he had to do his hair, which usually took an hour itself. 

He had to settle for the short version of hair styling, which meant it definitely wouldn’t look like it usually did, and quickly leapt over to Havenfield, preparing for the worst, not even letting himself hope for the best. 

And of course, the first thing he heard when he leapt onto the property was the Gorgodon’s ear shattering roar, and the familiar sound of some sort of fruit cracking as it hit the ground. 

For some reason it felt like coming home. 

He walked up to the doorway of the large manor, expecting to see Edaline or Sophie in the living room, and was confused to find that the first floor was completely unoccupied. It was weird to not have Sandor come running down the stairs at the first sign of a new scent, even if it had been nearly a month since the bodyguards were off assignment. 

It was especially weird to not have Sophie know he was there before he showed up at her bedroom door, so he knocked nervously, worried about what could happen on the other side of it. If he was going to be walking out feeling even worse. 

But most of that worry went away when Sophie opened the door and smiled at him, stepping aside to let him in. 

The first things he noticed were how guilty she felt, and how she looked like she hadn’t slept in days, which he could understand. Not that it made her any less beautiful. In fact, the added sleepiness and messy looking hair made her that much more adorable. 

He wasn’t even surprised, she could pull off anything.

It was the jitteriness and fidgeting that concerned him. The way she wouldn’t stop moving her hands, or the way she picked at her eyelashes, looking like she wanted to be pacing and tapping her foot against the other. 

She looked as nervous as he felt, and it made him feel just that much better, especially when he finally identified the emotion she was feeling as something along the lines of relief when she looked at him. 

He stood silent for at least a minute before Sophie perked up again, looking like she wanted to say something, but the words just wouldn’t come out of her mouth. 

Keefe looked up, prepared to meet her eyes and offer something, anything, that would make her feel better. For all he knew, she could have asked him to come because something horrible had happened. It could have nothing to do with the kiss. 

But before he could reach her face, he noticed her neck. 

Completely bare of anything but her registry pendant, her medicine, and her home crystal. 

Definitely no teal heart-shaped necklace in sight. 

Keefe couldn’t decide if that made him feel better or worse. 

He was scared out of his thoughts for the second time that day by Sophie saying, “So, have you talked to anyone in the past, say, three days?”

He took in a deep breath, finally preparing himself for that conversation. It was awkward to be standing around, feeling so stiff, around Sophie of all people. “Nope. Just my dad.” 

Sophie bit her lip and nodded, staring down at her boots. She tucked her hair behind her ear only for it to fall back to where it was before, covering her left eye. Just like the night of the ball. 

He would have danced with her if he’d known how far apart they would grow. He  _ should  _ have danced with her, even as a friend. 

But he wouldn’t have been able to be that close to her. It would have hurt him too much. 

“I’m sorry.”

Those tiny words, spoken so softly through a choke, made Keefe’s blood run cold for a split second. 

“I shouldn’t have put you in this position. It’s unfair to you. And to Fitz,” Sophie added, picking at her sleeve. She wasn’t wearing her gloves, making her emotions just that much more intense. 

He hated that all of her emotions recently had ranged from nervous to terrified, and that he was the reason for it. 

He didn’t know what to say, so he walked over to the floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked the cliffs, the water, and the hill that housed Calla’s panakes. For some reason, all he could think about was something Fitz had told him once, that Sophie’s room used to be a reception hall. 

He wondered if it had ever been used for a Winnowing Gala. Maybe Grady’s or Edaline’s. 

But that train of thought only brought him back to the situation at hand. 

Of course he had wondered what that moment would look like, if he finally came to it. That moment of crossing over from friends to something more. He imagined it going a lot smoother than this, with a lot less guilt clouding the air. A lot less heartbreak clogging their minds. 

He sucked in a breath, wishing for the calming aroma of the flowers that grew below them to calm him, ground him, make him steady. 

“This isn’t anyone’s fault,” he said, only then realising that he had spaced out. “I think it would have happened like this in one way or another.” 

Sophie moved to stand next to him, and brought with her that cloud of guilt that was making it hard to breathe. “But I could have handled it so much better than… this.” 

Keefe looked over, finally able to reach her eyes, and saw that she was looking at him with such intensity, such curiosity. He wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to look away. 

Those were the eyes that occupied his thoughts, his dreams. Sophie was finally staring back at him with the same intent he knew he threw her way. He’d familiarised himself with those eyes so often, stared into them every chance he could get. 

And that was the first time he’d ever noticed her looking at him the same way he looked at her. 

Like a switch had been flipped, the last piece of the puzzle finally fell into place. The bond between the heart and the head connected, he could see it when she looked at him, when her cheeks flushed red, and when her mood shifted from uneasy to… comfortable. 

It was all he’d been dreaming about for the past two years. 

“I think you’ve handled it well, for what it’s worth,” he whispered, taking a tentative step toward her. She placed her hand over his on the windowsill, bringing that familiar feeling of zooming out on her emotions, seeing the whole story. 

Before, it was like he’d flipped to the last page and read only the ending. Out of context, no way to know how to get there. But then the story slowly started from the beginning, small details standing out, hints as to what would happen to get to that ending. 

And he was finally there. 

Sophie bit her lip, looking much too conflicted to let this be anything but a long, confusing conversation, and said, “I hate how awkward this feels.”

Keefe offered his first real smile of the day, starting to feel like himself again, even if it was just a little bit. The difference was there. 

It was him and Sophie. It had always been him and Sophie. 

“Just talk to me the way you always have. We don’t keep secrets, remember?” he said, trying to give her as much reassurance as possible. He’d known this would be a hard conversation when they got to it, but it was a necessary evil in the grand scheme of things. 

“Well, except for the pretty obvious one,” Sophie said through a small laugh. 

Keefe pushed her shoulder lightly, definitely falling back into the swing of things. “See? There’s the Foster I know and love,” he blurted without thinking, and fell back just a step when he realised what he’d said. 

Should he not say that anymore?

He didn’t know the rules. 

If Sophie caught it, she didn’t let on. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes and forming a soft, relaxed look on her face. “I broke it off with Fitz two days ago. He saw the memory in my head of…,” she breathed again, this time looking at Keefe. “He saw the memory during cognate training, and it got the ball rolling about how we’d both been feeling, how we weren’t totally committed to each other anymore.”

Well,  _ that  _ was unexpected. 

He didn’t have Fitz pegged as the guy to make uncomplicated compromises. 

Or as the guy to let someone as amazing as Sophie get away. 

He blew out a breath, reaching up to rub the back of his neck. “I know this seems super lame, but do you need a hug?” 

Sophie smiled, sniffling just the smallest bit, and nodded as she wrapped her arms around his neck, having to stand on her toes in order to put her head on his shoulder. He held on just as tightly, arms around her waist, tempted to kiss her temple and wish that he could make all of the bad stuff just a little better. 

“This is the first time I’ve really been able to talk about it to someone, so… thank you for listening,” Sophie whispered to him, squeezing just a little bit tighter. Almost so tight that Keefe couldn’t breathe. 

Or maybe he couldn’t breathe because Sophie Foster was in his arms, and he was harbouring huge feelings for her. 

Either way, he couldn’t breathe. But he was okay with it. 

“I’ll always be here to listen. Always,” he told her softly, meaning every word. “Even when you think I won’t want to listen. I will.”

She pulled away then, turning to look back out the window, back at the water crashing onto the cliffside, flooding the cave, and asked, “do you ever just want to jump in? Not worry about how terrifying it will be because you know that once you land everything will be okay?” 

Keefe smiled, he could feel it was just shy of a smirk, and nodded his head. “Are you suggesting we cliff dive? Because I’m totally down,” he joked, feeling that then was the right time to brighten the mood. He felt her mood shift, the darkness disperse just like that, and turn into thin wisps of smoke, just barely hanging over her head. 

She laughed, turning around just to roll her eyes at him. “Don’t you think we’ve fallen off enough cliffs already?” she said through a giggle, her smile lightening the whole room. Keefe’s heart skipped a beat, and for a moment he was dumbstruck, unable to speak. 

“Trust me, Foster, we’ll probably be jumping off of cliffs to go save the world when we’re eighty-thousand years old.”

“Hopefully the world won’t need saving in eighty-thousand years.”

Keefe nodded again, taking a step closer and nearly jumping when the tip of his shoes tapped hers, their faces just a centimeter too close, and the air in the room seemed to stop moving, leaving them suspended in the same moment for far too long. So long that both of their faces turned red. 

It could have been a second, or it could have been a lifetime. All of it was the same to Keefe. 

Sophie looked down at their shoes and smiled, her hair falling over her face again. When she looked up, she bit her lip, her smile looking more nervous than anything. “Hi.”

Keefe took her hand, trying his best to ignore the enhancing so he could stay in that moment, and laced their fingers together. “Hey.”

“So… I keep thinking about the last time we were in this position,” she said sheepishly, and this time Keefe couldn’t help but notice the way her emotions rippled through the air between them, emotions she didn’t even realise she had, emotions that made his heart stop from how intense they were. 

And they were all for  _ him. _

“What a coincidence, I can’t get it out of my head, either,” he teased, running his thumb back and forth along her hand. 

If it was possible, Sophie’s cheeks flushed an even deeper red, and Keefe reached his free hand up to tuck her hair behind her ear, his thumb lingering on her jaw, tilting her head up just a bit so he could look her in the eyes. 

And man, he was so gone for her. 

He noticed everything he’d told himself he wasn’t allowed to notice in the past weeks. The golden flecks in her beautiful brown eyes, the crimson that adorned her cheeks, residue from eyeliner she had yet to wash away, and even the slight bruises under her eyes from losing sleep. Everything about her was so real, so  _ her,  _ and Keefe loved every bit of her. 

“Maybe we can have the happy ending this time around,” she whispered, her breath warm on Keefe’s already burning cheeks. 

“I’d like that,” he whispered against her lips, feather light and a hair's breadth away from becoming something they wouldn’t be able to back out on. 

And once it did, he never wanted it to end. 

Gentle was the first word that came to Keefe’s mind. It was gentle, careful, and slow. The way they slotted their lips together, saying so many things without having to speak. Saying “I missed you” with the slightest movement, “I like you” with every touch of the lips, and “I’m never letting you go” with every fleeting touch. 

But they already knew these things. They didn’t have to kiss to know that they had something special. 

To Keefe, it felt nice just to have her so close. They could be sitting around doing nothing, and his heart would still be hammering against his chest. And the thought that he wouldn’t have to hold back was liberating. 

It was even better than the first time, knowing that he could be all in. That he wouldn’t have to keep it a secret. That it wouldn’t be fleeting, or sparse, and he could exist in the moment. 

So he held on tight, held her close, and made sure she knew how much he wanted her there. Wanted  _ her _ . He ran his finger along her jaw, then let go of her hand and held onto her waist, pulling her even closer. For some reason, he knew what he was doing, even if he’d never done it before - not like this, at least. It came like instinct, like kissing Sophie was second nature to him. Like he already knew exactly what to do to drive her crazy.

She pulled away for a moment, not far enough to disconnect, but far enough to rest her forehead against his and smile widely, staring down at their shoes. She bit her lip, probably trying to hide the smile, but Keefe was glad when her efforts weren’t effective, because that smile made his heart stammer, and his cheeks warmer. She reached her hands up to the back of his head, her fingers playing at his hair, giving him goosebumps. 

He shouldn’t have been surprised to find that his ears were burning, or that when he looked at Sophie her lips were swollen. He hadn’t realised how… intense the kiss had become. Sure, it was slow, but that didn’t stop him from taking it just a little too far. 

Somehow, Sophie didn’t seem to care. She kept staring at her shoes, probably avoiding having to make eye contact. Keefe knew that if he looked into her eyes, he’d start stammering and stuttering. And he needed a moment to catch his breath, wait for his face to return to a normal colour that wasn’t reminiscent of a strawberry. 

“I… um…,” Sophie started, sounding just as nervous as Keefe felt, before she laughed a little bit, and covered her mouth, touching her lips like she couldn’t believe what had just happened. Or maybe she was noticing just how swollen they really were. Either way, it was beyond cute.

Keefe laughed along with her, and before they knew it they were giggling incessantly, neither really sure where to go from there, but certain that it was the start of something good. Something worth it. 

And Keefe was happy to start the sequel. A new story he didn’t already know the ending of. He could be just as in the moment as Sophie was, just as excited, just as nervous. It was impossible to feel anything but hopeful when he was holding her so close, kissing her so intensely one second and laughing with her the next. Feeling that there was much more than attraction, there was a connection. A bond that was ionic, that had tried to fray before but found itself unbreakable. 

**_“Nobody compares to you.”_ **

There was something special about breezy nights that made it so tempting to sit outside and do nothing but curl up under a blanket and listen to the sea.

Luckily for Keefe, he happened to live on a beach. That was how he found himself doing just that, sitting on the porch swing of The Shores of Solace with Sophie leaning against him, probably halfway to sleep if her calmness was anything to go by. 

Or maybe she really liked the sea. 

Or maybe she really liked him. 

Whatever the cause, he was glad Sophie was calm. She deserved to feel at ease after everything she’d been put through. And if Keefe could at least be a part of her happy place, he’d never leave her side. 

“Are you asleep?” Sophie asked beside him, startling him from his thoughts. He had his arm wrapped around her, holding her close as she leaned on him, her head on his shoulder. He ran his thumb back and forth on her upper arm as he told her he was awake. 

“I think I love you,” she mumbled sleepily, no precedent, no warning. Just an out of the blue ‘I love you.’ 

It could have been chalked up to exhaustion, or the sound of the waves crashing against each other making her head fuzzy, or…

“I love you, too,” he told her, squeezing her closer. 

She readjusted herself, holding on tightly to the blanket over them, and put her head on his chest, her eyes still closed. “You’re not just saying that because I did, right?”

Keefe chuckled, then reached his hand up to touch her cheek, and felt her smile, half-asleep and probably delirious. He wouldn’t doubt that she’d forget all of this by the morning. “No, Foster. I really do love you. Always will.” 

She opened her eyes then, looking at him with surprise, the curiosity and flutteriness coming off of her in waves. “How can you promise that?” she asked, this time taking Keefe by surprise. 

He smiled sheepishly, knowing that they were probably much too young to be making promises like that, to be so serious so soon. But he didn’t care. He knew how quickly things could change, how Sophie probably hadn’t quite grasped the concept that they had forever. If he was being honest, he hadn’t quite grasped it himself, with all of the times they’d almost died, and with how many people they’d lost all in the span of four years. Their lives were fleeting, and they were going by so quickly. They’d already grown and changed so much. 

“I can promise that we’ll grow together, and that one day we’ll be different people than we are today. I can promise that I will love you through it all because I know you, and I know you never do something without thinking it a million times over in that brilliant head of yours,” he told her, flying off the cuff, feeling so sure that he was right, that he’d love her forever. 

“You talk so good,” Sophie said, smiling at him with a dreamy sort of look, most likely with tears in her eyes, if the reflection of the moonlight was anything to go by. He laughed and squeezed her tighter, grabbing onto her hand, wanting to keep her close forever. 

“I’m gonna miss you this year,” he said offhandedly, staring back out at the sea, wondering what was on the other side. “Make sure you write letters to me all the time, no matter how boring they might be.”

He was going into level eight that year, and after a summer full of days spent with friends, nights spent on the beach, and all of it spent with Sophie, he was actually dreading going. When he was moving into the Gold Tower last year it had felt like that first breath of freedom, of fresh, unpolluted air. But that was before he was dating Sophie. That was while he was supposed to be backing off. 

“Honestly, I hope this year is boring. I’ve had too much excitement in my life for a sixteen year old,” she said. “And I’ll have classes in the Silver Tower, I’m sure I can get a study hall pass.” 

“And if you can’t, I’m sure we can break a few rules,” Keefe suggested, earning an elbow to the ribs. “Okay, or we can rely on weekends, if you’re not willing to cause a bit of trouble,” he added, squeezing her hand. 

Sophie held on just as tight, allowing for him to read her enhanced emotions, giving him that wide screen view. He of course had been holding her hand a lot more, but she usually had her enhancing blockers or gloves on, if not both. The moments where she would allow him to read her emotions on that level weren’t exactly a rarity, but were never taken lightly. If she would allow him to read emotions so personal - emotions she wasn’t even totally aware of all the time - then she must have really trusted him, and he’d never take that for granted. 

He could tell she was tired, since they’d been out in the sun all day. But she was also feeling calm, steady, and most of all, she was  _ happy.  _ There was almost nothing more to it. She was happy where she was, happy with who was next to her. And just when Keefe thought he couldn’t be more fond for her, he started feeling that familiar hummingbird-like intensity she always had around him. It was almost like he could feel her heartbeat. 

“I’m sure we’ll figure out something. You know I won’t go a week without talking to you,” Sophie said through a yawn, probably much closer to sleep than she’d ever admit. 

Keefe smiled to himself, giving her a reassuring squeeze of the shoulder. “You should get some sleep,” he said, letting go of her hand and pulling the blanket up higher. 

“But-”

“We’re safe,” he assured her, “I’m not going anywhere.” 

She tried to protest again, saying she wasn’t tired, but Keefe definitely wasn’t buying it. He didn’t have to read her emotions to know that she was exhausted, because he was just as exhausted from the day’s activities. Sophie had wanted to learn how to surf, so they’d taken to the beach in order to learn, even if Keefe wasn’t too good at it himself. There was more swimming than there was surfing. 

And by the end of the day, they’d been so wiped that Keefe had gone inside to grab blankets, pillows, and any kind of snack he could find, setting up a camp on the porch swing they’d sat on together a million times. 

Keefe almost felt smug, sitting in the exact spot where Alden had once told him to back off, with Sophie leaning against him, finally able to call her his girlfriend. A silent  _ you were wrong about this  _ to Alden and his speech about moving on two years ago. He would have liked to forget it, but the photographic memory didn’t let him. 

He probably wouldn’t have forgotten it even if he didn’t have a photographic memory. It wasn’t the kind of confrontation people usually forgot about. 

For him, it was more like ammunition. Another reason to keep following his instincts. In his experience, he knew he was on the right track when adults tried to stop him. 

And there he was, holding Sophie close, planting a light kiss to the top of her head as she stopped fighting to stay awake, and started breathing slow, rhythmic breaths. After another moment, the calmness settled in, and Keefe was about ready to conk out himself. It was a lot colder than it had been all day, and he’d given most of the blanket to Sophie, but the warmth of her laying against him made the chill disappear. 

Within a few minutes, he fell asleep with a smile on his face. 

*****

Waking up was a pain in the neck. Literally. 

Keefe had apparently slept with his neck at a ninety-degree angle all night, and immediately noticed that piercing pain at the top of his spine. 

Sophie, however, looked as comfortable and peaceful as a sleeping baby, her head resting in Keefe’s lap, hands holding her blanket up to her chin. 

The morning air was a lot colder than the night air, but it would be warming up soon if the wisps of orange in the horizon were anything to go by. 

“Foster, wake up,” he whispered, brushing his hand through her hair as she started stirring. “The sun is coming up.”

She opened her eyes, looking bleary and, in Keefe’s opinion, pretty adorable as she smiled when she finally saw him. He mostly wondered how she could look that perfect after just waking up from an outdoor slumber party, likely with a steady breeze blowing at them. Keefe was sure his hair was in disarray. 

But as Sophie sat up, brushing her hair out with her fingers, Keefe noticed the tiny ringlets that had formed amongst her blonde hair, while some of it was only made wavy by the salty water they’d been swimming in. And her skin was noticeably tanner, giving her a look that suggested she never left the beach. 

“You know, you’ve got a Cali Girl thing going on right now, I’m kinda loving it,” he told her, reaching over to take her hand while she took in her surroundings. The sun was only just barely showing itself over the horizon, and the sky was slowly shifting from dark blue to a mix of purple, pink, and orange, all blurring to create a scene that was worthy of a painting. 

Though the girl next to him was far more beautiful. 

“How do you know what a Cali Girl is?” she asked with an amused, yet playfully suspicious smile. 

Keefe rested their entwined hands on the blanket still over Sophie’s lap, the familiar smirk falling upon his lips as he said, “hey, Dex shows me a lot of movies. And Juline has this freakishly wide range of human knowledge.” 

Sophie laughed, looking out at the sunrise, probably waiting for warmth to find them. 

They were wearing pyjamas, and Keefe hadn’t even felt his cheeks warm up when Sophie saw his T-Rex covered pants, but his entire face was on fire when he remembered how short Sophie’s shorts were. 

It made it all the more embarrassing when she looked back at him, catching his eye with a crimson flush over her nose and cheeks. 

Though maybe that was a sunburn. 

“You know,” she started, mocking his earlier statement, “the sun really makes those freckles you always try to say you don’t have much darker.” 

Keefe’s eyes widened, and he reached up to touch his nose with his free hand, as if he’d be able to feel them. “I don’t have freckles!” he protested, knowing it was a losing battle. No matter what, he knew she would never let the subject go, as long as he kept denying the existence of the smattering of freckles on the bridge of his nose, spreading to his cheeks. 

And perhaps he denied their existence on purpose, just to hear the words…

“Seriously, they look good on you. They’re cute.”

Keefe couldn’t help but pull her a little closer, teasing her by staying just out of reach, just not close enough. He knew it drove her crazy, and he could feel the way her emotions spiked, then quickly she got just frustrated enough to grab at his collar and pulled him in the rest of the way, giving him just enough time to get out a single laugh before she planted a soft kiss to his lips. 

“You’re cuter,” Keefe murmured against her lips, smiling when he felt the way her hummingbird flutters overrode everything, making even his own heart start to stumble over itself. 

She pulled away then, pushing Keefe ever so slightly, rolling her eyes as she smiled widely. 

There really was nothing that compared to seeing Sophie smile, especially so often, so carelessly, and so freely. 

Proof that all of what happened really was behind them, and that they could truly start to move on. 

Sophie tucked her unruly hair behind her ear, only for the blonde ringlets to come bouncing right back to where they were, framing her face so perfectly as she asked, “how mad do you think my parents are about me staying the night?” 

Clearly she’d meant it as a joke, but he could tell she was freaking out. Sure, they’d planned their little sleepover, but Grady and Edaline hadn’t been too keen on the idea, even after Keefe’s many nights spent at Havenfield.

Keefe couldn’t blame them, either. But he also knew just how much they’d both needed a night of careless fun. Sophie had been missing Sandor, and Keefe was determined to remind her what life without a bodyguard was like, how much freedom she could have. 

He, however, had just needed a night with his girlfriend. A night not spent alone.

“I’m sure they’re fine. It’s not like they don’t know me,” he teased. 

“I’m sure that’s exactly why they are  _ not  _ fine,” she said pointedly, giving him the side eye, to which he only grinned cheekily. 

He reached up to stroke her cheek with his thumb, getting a good look at her face, how happy she looked. No exhaustion, no stress, no worrying that she or someone she loves might not wake up the next day. 

It was all he could ever ask for. 

“Don’t worry your pretty head. They’re probably relieved that you’re doing normal teenager-y things,” he reassured her, his thumb trailing down to her chin, lifting her head up when she tried to look at her lap. “Maybe you should hail them, just in case,” he whispered, letting go when she nodded and stood up, finding her overnight bag and walking down the beach, hailing Edaline. 

Keefe couldn’t look away. She kept combing her hair out with her fingers, obviously not having much luck when her wavy tangles started fighting back. She was absolutely captivating, though, especially when the golden hue of the sunrise shone upon her, making her glow the way he imagined an angel would. 

He almost forgot that he didn’t have to look away when she walked back over, that he didn’t have to hide how he felt about her anymore. 

“Well, Edaline seems fine, but we should both be glad that Grady went on assignment last night,” she said, sitting down and wrinkling her eyebrows together the way she did when she was worried. 

Keefe reached over, pressing his thumb against her forehead, grabbing her hand to send calming breezes through her mind. “Right now, all you need to worry about is me kicking your ass with my amazing surfing skills,” he warned her with a smile, hoping to get at least an eye roll from her. 

Instead she stood up, dragging him out of his comfortable state on the swing, and out toward the sea. “We’ll see about that,” she said with a confident grin and a mischievous glint in her eye, like she was about to push him into the water with his pyjamas on. 

As it happened, that’s exactly what she did. And Keefe totally got her back for it, sneaking up on her and bear hugging her from behind, dragging her into the water with him. 

Slowly, as they resurfaced, Keefe held her close, their faces inching closer and closer with every long, drawn out second, and kissed her with as much passion as if it were their first, and not a hundred-something. He’d never get used to the feeling of kissing Sophie. 

And he knew that he wanted to hold onto her. They’d been through so much, and still came out in one piece, in tact, with only a few scars to show for their experiences. He’d never let her go, she was the only Sophie Foster, the only girl he was in love with, who could make him smile even in the darkest of times. There was nobody who could compare. 

**Author's Note:**

> oh im so glad you made it this far, i can finally stop using proper capitalisation. i included a little bitty thing from legacy that you'd only really notice if you read it, and im kinda super proud of that tiny little detail. 
> 
> really, this started out as an idea from @silveny-dreams. we were talking about how most (all) one direction songs fit the dynamic of sokeefe, and her prompt for me was to write a sokeefe fic in which sophie finds out that keefe listens to one direction. and don't get me wrong, i started writing that, but in the process, i just got this spark of an idea, and i knew i had to see it through to the end. so, while one direction isn't directly in the story, i hope this suffices that need for a sokeefe/one direction fic. 
> 
> thank you all so much for reading! you should definitely stay tuned, because i have some ~things~ planned, depending on whether or not i will have the motivation to actually get started. bye!


End file.
